If You Can't Beat Em' In The Alley.....PUCK ROCK Volume 2...

All Killer, No Filler

Well as we all know, the basketball lock out is still happening, though the players union and the owners are negotiating away, attempting to salvage the 2011-2012 season. I was looking forward to see how the New York Knicks were going to do this season, but it is conceivable that once the Superbowl ends in February, Hockey will be the only game in town. Currently it is the only game for most days of the week, which does not bother me in the least. Watching is not as much fun as playing, not by a long shot, but I am perplexed why the sport isn't more popular in most of the US. It's exciting, fast moving, and pretty violent at times. What's an American not to like? I guess since its the national sport of Canada we can't seem embrace this pastime. Same reason bullfighting isn't going to replace the NBA anytime soon for us. But we simply can't compete--when Canadian children are born, they are fitted for skates as the umbilical cord is cut--it's an arms race we can't compete with. But if you watched Fareed Zakaria's GPS you probably know this already.

So, what better theme music is there for the battle for Lord Stanley's Cup than Johnny Hanson Presents Puck Rock Vol. 2!! Released back in 1999 on Joe Keithley's Sudden Death Records, a label that has done a great service in making a lot of essential Canadian punk rock readily available. I have already discussed Volume 1 in an earlier post, and like its predecessor, Volume 2 is a bit of a mixed bag, but still with a lot to recommend it. If the best of both volumes was on a single disc it would be a recording of ice melting awesomeness. But the best things here make it a worthwhile consumer for your favorite hockey punk. The album starts out pretty strong, then peters out with too much samey sounding aggro/hard core.

First of all the disc begins and closes with Hanson brothers. Some people would want to take their kids to see Smurfs on ice, but the Hansons are basically the Ramones on ice. Though I enjoy my hilarious Connecticut beer hockey compatriots The Zambonis, the Punk Hansons are the Kings in my opinion. Marvel at the their take on the D.O.A punk classic The Enemy, turning the tune into an all time great hockey song. They fittingly end the compilation with Ring Dem Bells, a Hanson original. "The sticks are up and the gloves are down, Grab your partner round and round". I think they have 3 studio discs and a live for all you completists out there.

The other hands down classic is D.O.A.'s turbocharged tribute to old-time hockey, Beat 'Em Bust 'Em.

Headbutting, eyegouging,
Impaling, decapitating
A broken arm and skull,
fracture, conquest & defeat,
A 5 minute major and a suspension,
a new team
and a hospital sheet.

Joe Keithley......he's like a Canadian Dylan Thomas. More hockey songs, please! It doesn't get better than this folks. One of the best sports songs ever.




The Swedish band The Bones make a nice punk pop contribution with Some Kinda Freaks. Euro-contenders. You High Sticked My Heart by the Dinks is also pretty good. As far as the harder edged songs go, The Red Wings tune The Commies, and Penalty Box by The Commies are decent, short and not so sweet. Royal Grand Prix's CCM is more overdriven punky pop.



Jon Ginoli's Pansy Division (see my post on his earlier band, The Outnumbered) make an appearance with their funny song about mullets, Ice Hockey Hair. I like the hard riff rocking 60's sound of JP5, where they declare their love of Gino Odjick. Sillier novelty songs like Hockey Night in Toronto by King Hokum & the King Bees, and The Stool Pigeons' DollyPartonesque Ballad of Cookie LaRue, are also pretty entertaining.

Probably the only other hockey classic is Blood on the Ice by The Riverdales, a side project of Screeching Weasel. More Ramones inspired puck rock glory.

Blood on the Ice
There's a puck flying at your head
Slammed into the boards and
you hit the deck

Get up and try to fight
but you're going down tonight
It's time to drop the gloves
Blood on the ice.

So, it's almost winter, so do yourself a favor; drop the gloves already and pick up some Puck Rock today, pencil neck.